Monday 30 May 2022

The Month That Was......May 2022

 

What a bizarre month it was. We spent half the month debating Angela Rayner’s legs (she has two) and how off putting they may be for a sexually charged beast of Prime Minister. The other half was spent discussing the Tory MP Neil Parish’s viewing of pornography while in the House of Commons. All this has happened against a backdrop of 56 MPs being under active investigation for allegations of sexual harassment, misconduct or assault. Good luck in finding someone in politics who doesn’t treat it all like a stag weekend!

At the same time, the Conservatives suffered significant losses in local elections, losing almost 500 seats and control of 11 councils. BoJo said the results had been “mixed”. Oh, the embarrassment.


Bizarre moments were not just contained to politics……I had a few bizarre episodes and realisations myself……

- I admitted openly that I have the blind self-confidence that I could fillet a fish based only on the fact that I’m quite good at cutting open a pitta bread.

- I failed to go a day without having to reset yet another password.

- I bought an item of clothing on my own without my good lady and when I showed it to her, she actually liked it and didn’t make me return for a refund. I know……incredible news. Pretty confident I can buy the other sock now. 


 - Clare Balding should get done under the Trades Description Act……she's got a fine head of hair.

- France gave the UK 12 points in the Eurovision Song Contest. What on earth is happening? Is everyone OK? It shows the pity the rest of Europe has for us when we finish 2nd to a war torn country. Europe literally feels sorry for us.

- I considered for far too long whether dogs panic when they see police dogs.

 

- How bizarre that they closed the streets in London to allow Prince Charles to catch a lift to Parliament to deliver the Queens speech which included a bill that stopped people closing all the streets in London to protest.

- I pulled a new chest of drawers out of the cardboard box by its feet and it’s the closest I’ve ever felt to delivering a calf.

- I also googled ‘do you need a passport to be an astronaut’?

Like I said……May has been a truly bizarre month.

 

The Numbers

The Bank of England’s latest report dominated economic news and provided the backdrop to the deepening gloomy outlook.

The Bank interest rate was raised to 1%, the highest level since 2008. The Bank of England announced its latest predictions that will see the economy slow sharply at the end of 2022 and risks dipping into recession next year, shrinking by 0.25% (down from the previous forecast of 1.25% growth).

Inflation hit 9%, which is a 40-year high. The Bank of England has warned inflation might reach 10% within months, as the price of fuel and food put pressure on household budgets.

The UK’s unemployment rate has fallen to 4.8%, the lowest level since 1974. The Office for National Statistics said that the economy had more open job vacancies than unemployed people for the first time since records began. This can only further fuel inflation if businesses raise wages to retain staff.

House price inflation continued at speed with prices rising for the tenth month in a row. The price of an average home increased by 1.1% over the month. Year-on-year, house prices are 10.8% higher. It is the longest run of continuous gains in house prices since the end of 2016.

The economic big boys of US and China also have their own troubles that are impacting the world economy.

The US central bank announced its biggest interest rate increase in more than 22 years as it toughens its fight against inflation running at 8.5%, a 40-year high.

Unlike most of Europe, which is exposed to higher Russian energy costs, US inflation has been driven by domestic factors led by a booming labour market. The Biden administration’s $1.9 trillion pandemic-era bazooka is now widely seen as fiscal overkill that helped the economy to overheat.

Perhaps most worrying for the world’s largest economy is consumer confidence declining to its lowest level in more than 10 years as sentiment fell by 9.4%.

China produces more than 35% of the world's electronic goods. Expect shortages or price increases as production is hit by China battling Covid and many parts of their economy remain locked down.

And some tabloid fodder for you to consider. The Metropolitan Police ended their ‘partygate’ inquiry. Detectives investigated 12 gatherings held over 8 dates while Covid restrictions were in place. 126 fines were issued to 83 people. A team of 12 detectives worked through 345 documents, including emails, door logs, diary entries and witness statements, 510 photographs and CCTV images and 204 questionnaires. All at a snip for the taxpayer……a total cost of £460,000.

 

Trump of the Month

My goodness the ‘bizarre’ state of May gave me a raft of considerations for the Trump of the Month award. 

The ever cringy Michael Gove MP gave an interview so bad he was trending with ‘cocaine’. See for yourself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XBQCPZOnxF4

George Bush gave us the greatest Freudian slip in history (or guilty conscience?). The guy is literally obsessed with Iraq……

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6-aUVgBCFs

Oliver Dowden MP donated a bottle of champagne signed by BoJo to a charity event in Hertfordshire. Read the room Oli, read the room. 


Lee Anderson MP was condemned by, well, pretty much everyone after arguing in the Commons that food banks are largely unnecessary because the main cause of food poverty is a lack of cooking and budgetary skills. Oh yeah, because nothing says ‘solution to food shortages’ like cooking pasta al dente darling. Idiot.

Not to be out done, BoJo has been banging the drum for everyone to get back to the office as working from home doesn’t work. “In my experience you make a coffee, go to the fridge, hack off a piece of cheese and walk very slowly back to your computer,’ he said. This from a man that literally works from home!

BoJo then went on to Channel 4 News to discuss the Northern Ireland protocol that he designed and signed off. "Yes, I agreed it but I hoped and believed our friends, the EU, would not necessarily want to apply it". He literally signed a contract in the hope the other party would not enforce it.

But May’s Trump of the Month has to go to……the Bank of England’s Andrew Bailey.


As a starter, he signed off a £50,000 redesign of the Bank of England logo to be more inclusive for those in Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland. The St George’s Cross was dropped from the central bank’s logo and replaced with the Union Jack.

Call me a little picky, but surely the issue might be in the word ‘England’ not a dated logo? Might just be me. Just a thought. 

Before......


 After £50,000......

Then for the main course…..Andrew Bailey blamed high inflation on Ukraine in the Treasury Committee hearing. Yet UK inflation was already at 6.2% in February before Russia’s invasion……way above the 2% target he is tasked with.

With room for a desert, Andrew Bailey then claimed that “it is a very difficult place to be in to say that there will be 10% inflation and there is nothing we can do about 80% of it".

So, what is the point of Andrew Bailey and the rest of the Monetary Policy Committee if you are powerless to control the one thing that you are tasked with controlling? Why do they exist then? What is it that we actually get for the £5 million being spent on those 9 salaries?

Trump Lunacy Rating: 10 / 10


And Finally……

“The price of greatness is responsibility.”

Winston Churchill

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